I will never forget the moment where I finally allowed my pent up rage to overtake my body. My bodyworker’s elbow had been on THE point in my upper right shoulder for what felt like forever, and neither she nor the pain was going away.
We were at a stalemate, so she went for the jugular. “Aren’t you just biding your time right now? Pretending it’s ok, but waiting, so you can go home and continue to be a frustrated victim and complain?” she said.
And that was it!!
The leash came off, and the rage that I was doing my absolute best to tame, muffle, tamp down came roaring out of me with no firewall to stop it.
It blazed up from my belly with hot ferocity, then quickly spread down to my legs and sent a convulsion through my entire torso. My arms pushed my body up from the table right as a gigantic roar reverberated up from deep inside of me and emanated out into the room.
By this time, her elbow was off of my back, and my body did its thing, until this dose of rage had fully coursed through it. Then I lied back on the table to rest. My breath was huge, my mind was crisp, and there was not one ounce of bullshit left in the room.
Pure energy of rage
Rage is a raw, potent, powerful force inside of us. When it is unleashed, it can be unrelenting, until it burns through what it needs to burn through. The…
- tightly contracted muscles of our inaction
- rigidity of our self-righteousness or victimhood
- incessant stories, explanations, and complaints in our minds that muffle courageous words and choices we haven’t spoken or made.
The idea of rage we usually have in our minds feels dangerous, ugly and damaging. And if it’s held back for years and years and years, it can be. And yes, there are clear reasons why we have held it back in the past and why we may continue to do so today. There are always reasons. But they only deny the force of this energy.
Unreleased rage does damage. It leaves us contracted, impotent, powerless and passive in the face of things we clearly want or don’t want.
When rage dynamically runs its course through the body, it can be one of the most accurate and powerful tools you have in life.
The pure energy of rage…
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- Burns away all that is unnecessary.
- Clears space around and inside of us.
- Knows what it wants and doesn’t want.
- Expands and then self-contains.
- Determines an ending.
- Leaves you empty and prepared for what’s next.
Moving the rage
In this short video demonstration, I start with the contraction. I emphasize and repeat it, because this is how I felt my pattern of intensely trying to deny the rage. Compressed and without space. The more I repeat the stuck movements, the more I breathe and give them energy; I stoke the fire.
I reach a point, where I cannot rigidly contain this energy any longer, and I let it move me. My body then moves with size, space and quickly changing direction, until I find a place of clear, full-bodied determination. It reached and permeated through my blood, muscles, skin, breath and mind.
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What I learned about rage in that long-ago bodywork session, and what I continue to explore and develop through movement and embodiment practices, has become an invaluable tool. One that I can call upon when I need to cut through all the layering of being reasonable, acceptable and nice to reach lucidity, strength and determination.
It takes practice, body awareness and a commitment to yourself and your personal freedom.
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Workshops
Every workshop I teach touches some aspect of this force directly or indirectly.
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- Embodying Boundaries – Rage holds no doubt and determines its edges. We need it to move beyond where we unnaturally stop ourselves, and clearly say, NO.
- Tapping into your Feminine Power – We hold rage deeply in our hips, low bellies and womb. We access its physical potential through deep movement and a more intimate connection to our lower bodies.
- Embodying Love in Conflict – Old, pent up rage gets triggered over and over in our everyday disagreements. When we release it through our bodies, new space and options open up. We gain a more palpable connection to reality and can let go of the past.
- Embodying Elements – The element of fire holds rage. It is one of 4 elements we will work with. We’ll move it through the fire of our muscles, the pulsation of our hearts, the expansion of our breath and the heat of our bodies.
- Shifting Shame, Releasing Fear – As shame opens and shifts, old injustices can surface, whether ours or from previous generations. The rage then is awoken and moved, and we remember our dignity.