I went to see the moving Booksmart about a week ago. If you haven’t seen it yet, find out where it’s playing. (I promise you, you’ll walk out of there floating a few inches above the ground, lost in the delightful reverie of love, best friends and hope).
It was full of the most delicious eye-locks, body-filled glances, quivering crushes, wettening turn-ons, and tiny, huge heart breaks. And, it was told through the deep love story between best friends.
And this line…
Do you remember the last time you felt so wildly free and sure of yourself as to take your best friend’s face between your hands, look directly in their eyes and say these words, with a fierce, unbound heart? Without one ounce of hesitation or readiness to be rejected?
I can’t.
I can’t remember the last time I had complete trust in my body, where nothing I felt or needed to say could be restrained. I do have this love for my best friend, but she’s in Berlin, so too far for my hands to reach. But even so, to be able to feel such freedom to express exactly what I want, without censoring any of it?
Oh my goodness, the yearning I feel right now to find the courage to live this way, all the time. Not just in fits and spurts, here and there. Not just when it’s safe.
Can you imagine? The courage to feel what you feel, say what you want, move from your instinct and live according to your heart without any fear of being too much?
To live this way means:
- the words don’t get stuck on the way from your heart to your voice.
- not one drop of feeling dries up before you express yourself.
- you’re willing to tremble with aliveness, despite potential consequences
- you’ll join life’s potency, uncensored, and let go of controlling the outcome
What if we decided to do this? Despite our trauma, hurts and rejections, what if we decided to bound out of our houses every day, with the delicious youth of our souls, and meet the world?
I know!!! It’s not that simple. Otherwise, we’d all be doing it, and I wouldn’t have anything to do, work-wise.
We’d be breaking the rules. Howling at the moon, skinny dipping in the pool, sauntering into work, flirting with the mechanic, and crushing hard on the blue-eyed, 25-year old who served us our chocolate, superfood-laden smoothie.
We’d let life take our breath away, if we weren’t living through our scars.
I have the creaks and wrinkles, the aches and pains, the loose skin and dry vagina to go along with my physical age. But the secret I’m noticing everywhere I look, is that we all have a twinkle in our eyes, when life flirts with us and takes our breath away. And I’ll admit, I want to take life’s breath away too.
Take a moment. Sensitize your body. Look outside you, beyond the scars. Even if just for a moment. Let life see you, as you breathe, move and listen to the sound of your heart beating.